Friday, September 30, 2011

Little Jihadist Weiners…

Remember Anthony Weiner? The US Representative from New York (Democrat, by the way. That fact was simply ignored for the most part during his 15 minutes of fame.) who so angrily and defiantly condemned us all for not believing his ridiculous lie about having his Twitter account Weiner1 hacked? Remember that? He tried to claim that someone else had gotten a hold of his account info, taken a picture of their own….umm….well, “weiner” and sent it out to various women. Eventually he admitted that the story he had so adamantly force-fed to us was pure poppy-“cock”, and admitted that he had not only sent the lewd photos, but had also instructed his porn star mistress (among others) to lie about their relationship. Well sadly, it turns out that sending pictures of his little congressman may have been the least offensive aspect of this entire fiasco. I personally don’t care what anyone does with their private parts as long as they are not aiming them at me, or anyone I care about. Use them in accordance with the law, and your sexual exploits are your own business. Technically, he didn’t break any laws, other than the laws of decency. He’s a congressman, so those laws obviously don’t apply. The double standard applied to politicians is ridiculous and we all know it. I won’t get into a long diatribe about the way liberals slam conservatives anytime the slightest indiscretion is discovered, but consistently ignore the same within their own party. That’s fine. As maddening as it is, we bring it on ourselves. Conservatives claim the moral high-ground so when one of us is caught with our pants down (literally), we deserve a bit more judgment than those who proudly adhere to a strict policy of moral bankruptcy. That’s not the discussion for today.

The scariest part of Weiner Gate is the part that has not been reported at all. The scariest part is that our government either believes we are too stupid to connect the dots, or they themselves are actually too stupid to do so. The mysteries that should be undergoing thorough investigations are instead being ignored. “The story is behind us, let’s move on” seems to be the mantra of the left. I’m not so sure that the lewd conduct of the congressman now enjoying his third trimester of unemployment was the real problem. As the story unfolds (absurdly quietly, by the way) connections and mysteries are raised that just make the hairs on the back of my neck stand erect. (NO! I will NOT stop making dick-jokes! You lie to me and then talk down to me as if I’m an idiot with a name like Weiner; you will get every joke I can come up with!)

QUESTION 1: How did a Jewish man gain permission to marry a devout Muslim woman, and vice-versa? This is a very serious violation of Sharia law.

Weiner2 QUESTION 2: How did a devout Muslim with strong and documented ties to the Muslim Brotherhood come to hold a position within the highest ranks of US Government? The credo of the Muslim Brotherhood is: "God is our purpose, the Prophet our leader, the Qur'an our constitution, Jihad our way and dying for God's cause our supreme objective." Doesn’t really seem like someone following that credo should hold a trusted position within the United States Department of State, does it? Am I just being a prick?

The facts that have been completely ignored by what has become an absurdly complacent, almost brainwashed media are much more frightening than a Congressman sending out a few pictures of his “constituents.” Here’s what we know, that has not been reported or investigated anywhere that I can find. At least not to the degree warranted.

1. Anthony Weiner, a Jew, married Huma Abedin, a Muslim woman, in 2010. Former US President Bill Clinton officiated the ceremony.

2. Huma Abedin was born in Michigan, but was raised in Saudi Arabia by devout Muslim parents. She was later educated in the US.

3. At age 20, Huma Abedin started working as a White House assistant to then first lady,weiner3 Hillary Clinton in 1996. She and Cruella de Cankles have been inseparable ever since.  She now holds the position of Aide and Deputy Chief of Staff to Secretary Hillary Clinton in the State Department.

4. According to numerous sources, which have never been denied or refuted, the mother of Huma Abedin is a member of the Muslim Sisterhood. (The women's division of the Muslim Brotherhood.)

5. Islamic scholars and experts confirm that no Muslim woman, especially devout Muslims and members of the sisterhood, may marry a non-Muslim man unless that man has converted to Islam.

6. It is well known, especially in intelligence circles including the CIA and the FBI, that the Muslim Brotherhood is the most notorious global, anti-American, jihadist organization in the world. Their long range sights are set upon establishing an Islamic caliphate in the west. (That means, converting America into an Islamic nation, folks). According to their own documents - authored by the highest levels in the Brotherhood - America is destined to be settled as an Islamic nation, and that it will use deceit and infiltration to accomplish this goal from within.

Mein Kampf Anyone remember a book called Mein Kampf? We glossed over that one too. We thought “Oh, those are just the maniacal ravings of a madman. No one will ever really listen to him.” We were wrong. The Muslim Brotherhood Project, written in 1982, has been the marching orders for Muslim Jihadists around the globe just as Hitler’s craziness guided the Nazi movement.

Here is an excerpt from the Muslim Brotherhood Manifesto – written in their own language – introduced at the Holy Land Foundation trial.

“The process of settlement is a "Civilization-Jihadist Process" with all the means. The Ikhwan [Muslim Brotherhood] must understand that their work in America is a kind of grand Jihad in eliminating and destroying the Western civilization from within and "sabotaging" its miserable house by their hands and the hands of the believers so that it is eliminated and Allah's religion is made victorious.”

Wait a minute……did they just say they would destroy us "by our hands”? As in “use our own laws against us”? Could it be that the very people we consider to be our enemies (extremists; scripture manipulating madmen; etc) are using our own convoluted, hyper-sensitive, often common-sense free laws to sabotage us? I’ll re-read it, but that’s sure what it sounded like to me. (Can you sense slight sarcasm?)

Based on these facts, there are several conclusions we can draw from the whole Weiner Exposure.

1. Hillary Clinton is either blind, an idiot, or complicit (possibly a combination of the three) in the fact that a person with known ties to such a terrorist organization is working in the highest levels of our government.

2. There is certainly more to the story of the Weiner wedding than what we currently know. If Anthony Weiner converted to Islam, it was done surreptitiously because it would have been a death sentence to his political career. And if so, Weiner certainly knew of the Muslim Brotherhood connections of his wife.

3. An Imam from the Islamic Cultural center of New York, Omar Abu-Namous, not only approved of the union, but he has also encouraged Huma Abedin to stand by her man during the cybersex scandal. Thus, it must be advantageous to the goals of Islamic jihad and the Muslim Brotherhood to have Huma Abedin inside the bowels of the Department of State with dailyWeiner4 access to governmental intelligence. Therefore, her "marriage" to a US Congressman, regardless of religion, was openly accepted.

It is time we wake up and protect our asses! No one is going to do it for you. Stop cowering under the guise of political correctness and stand up to what has become a silent invasion. The demonic assholes that committed the cowardly acts in New York City, Pennsylvania, and Washington DC on September 11, 2001 did so after months of blending into our society. They drank liquor regularly. They caroused with women. They ate pork and appeared to be average, law abiding, immigrants. Their mission was to infiltrate and kill. The mission of the Muslim Brotherhood is to infiltrate and conquer. Even if it takes centuries, their marching orders are to “maintain the appearance of moderation to mask the true intentions of Islamic Action.

Things like a little man named Weiner sending a few pics of his little man named Weiner to a few women who have no doubt been shown quite a few little men named Weiner don’t really seem so bad when you step back and look at the bigger story. The fact that he is no longer a Congressman does very little to set my mind at ease. His devout Muslim, and now pregnant, wife is loyal to a group of people willing to wait hundreds of years to make sure my future relatives bow and pray to a god that would permit the actions of 9/11. Forget the wars in Afghanistan. Forget the little madman in Iran. Forget about dick-pics. What does any of it matter if the enemy is killing us from within. Is terror the distraction? Are acts like car-bombings, bus bombings, school massacres, beheadings, and hijackings all done to mask the actual intent of this so called brotherhood? Did they anticipate our need for revenge after such acts on our own soil? Did our reaction to 9/11 provide the perfect distraction? If you think about it, it’s rather brilliant. Most likely TOO brilliant. Hopefully too brilliant. To assume that they would know our culture and our propensity to forgive is giving a ton of credit. Our liberal fear of hurting someone’s feelings has become the enemy’s most valuable weapon. We wouldn’t want to not hire someone based on their religious affiliations. That would violate discrimination laws, etcetera. When are we going to allow common-sense to prevail when we come to the realization that one of our laws was created in a different time to address and antiquated list of problems? Your religion, Mrs. Weiner, is not the problem. Your radicalized, extremist interpretation of your religion is the problem. You’re fired.

As always, thanks for playing.


On a personal note, I’d like to take a second to thank all of those that have recently stood up to workplace terrorists and challenged the accepted standard in defense of the woman I love. You’ve appeased a ton of helpless feelings on this end. Thank you

Photographs of the Richt versus Dooley football game to benefit the Athens Boys and Girls club on August 19, 2006 in Athens Georgia on the Reed Hall quad.  Richt (the red team) won the game with a score of 14 to 7.  Identifications are available for some of the children, contact me for info.<br /><br />(Thomas O'Connor -

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

The Devil’s Winning…..

Greed, Gluttony, and California

Okay, so maybe California is not the direct result of the devil, but he was definitely one of the State’s founding fathers (or ‘Framers’ as they are required to be called in California textbooks now). People who would have been burned at the stake just a century ago are now the most influential ones in our kid’s lives. I remember my grandfather seeing the 1970’s version of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders uniforms and becoming increasingly DCC2 uncomfortable. I’m not sure if it was one of those “teacher, I CAN’T come to the blackboard right now” moments that all boys go through a few times in their lives or if it was the fact that he was watching the scantily clad women parade around the TV screen with his impressionable grandson in the room with him. Maybe it was a bit of both. Either way, I’ve never changed the channel when they’re bouncing around the screen during a game.

We all know the Seven Deadly Sins. The photo to the right embodies a few of them by itself, but have you stopped lately and taken a really good look at how many of them we commit on a daily basis without giving the act a second’s thought. Hey…..stop looking at the picture, dammit!

Pride – Thomas Aquinas, the Medieval Theologian and eventual Catholic Saint, wrote “inordinate self-love is the cause of every sin.” (I’d put a picture of St. Thomas Aquinas on this page but I’m afraid it would cause a noticeable imbalance with the previously posted art.) Think about that statement for a second. It could not be more true of our society today. Kids are taught to love themselves above all else. We have grown to believe that our own needs and wants are more important than those of anyone else on the planet. Common courtesy has Kanye been pushed aside to make room for self-serving YouTube posts, popularity, and unjustified respect. No one is willing to be truly great anymore. We just want adoration laid at our feet simply because we exist. Remember when you actually had to earn respect and loyalty. Now it seems that the more shocking and vulgar you allow yourself to be in public, the more of a following you will have.  The most mundane act has propelled categorically unworthy celebrities into realms of fame they have no business even locating, let alone residing in.

Envy – Envy is the desire for another person’s traits, status, abilities, or situation. Envy causes us to grieve when good things happen to our neighbors. In it’s most innocent form, envy can be witnessed at any child’s birthday party. The kid having the party and receiving the gifts and attention is on cloud nine. (Usually launched there by the fuel of cake, anticipation, and attention.) The kids who are simply attending the party watch as their friend opens gift after gift and is treated like royalty. Their little brains can’t comprehend the fact that THEY will be the ones getting that attention in just a few short days, weeks, or months. They have an excuse. What’s yours? What’s our excuse, as adults, for feeling a sense of personalP7161262 accomplishment when a celebrity loses some of their luster? (Insert Charlie Sheen reference here) Why must someone lose in order for us to feel victory? This lesson was taught to me by my father a few years back when he lost a job he had loved for over three decades to a sniveling little weasel who lied and manipulated his way into the minds of the Board of Directors. I was angry. I wanted revenge. I wanted to march into the corporate headquarters and de-brain the bastard sitting in what should have been my father’s office. My father however, felt none of those things. We were walking my son down the cul-de-sac near my home. I asked my Dad why he wasn’t more angry and he explained that anger is a waste of energy. It took a while for me to see it that way, but eventually the company that had abandoned my father went to crap and my dad is happier than he’s ever been. Not because of the company’s failings. He’s happy because he truly practices what he preaches and that my friends is a trait I hope to someday master.  

Gluttony – Gluttony is the inordinate desire to consume more than your body requires. There is no better example of gluttony than America. We are a country built on excess. We shovel food in our mouths at a rate that would make most countries literally sick to their stomachs. And don’t think that just because you don’t have a big muffin top belly hanging over the top of your designer jeans that you are not part of this definition. Even the physically fit citizens of the US Fat Bastard consume more than will ever be required for survival.

In the words of nineteenth-century Russian Bishop Ignatius Brianchaninov:

Wise temperance of the stomach is a door to all the virtues. Restrain the stomach, and you will enter Paradise. But if you please and pamper your stomach, you will hurl yourself over the precipice of bodily impurity, into the fire of wrath and fury, you will coarsen and darken your mind, and in this way you will ruin your powers of attention and self-control, your sobriety and vigilance.

TV commercials don’t make life much easier in the old stomach restraining pursuit. I can’t remember the last time I ate a burger from that place that serves it’s coffee crotch-melting hot, but every time I see an ad on TV, I salivate like one of Pavlov’s hounds. (Please don’t believe that I see myself as a perfect specimen of health and self discipline. I had a piece of chocolate cake during the game last night that would have made Rosie O’Donnell envious!)

Lust – Lust is the inordinate cravings of bodily pleasures. Of course it is next to impossible to claim innocence of this sin. Sex, flesh, and temptation are literally everywhere. Even Church has become a cleavage filled extravaganza. Lust is not necessarily something we can control as it has been proven that men have sexual urges every .00063 seconds. (Couldn’t find an actual number, but I bet that’s not too far off.) Women are just as guilty but have become masters at disguising their lust. The problem is not that lust exists. The problem is that we as a society continue to encourage such behavior. My stepdaughter wears shorts to school on a regular basis that would have made her the most popular girl in any school I ever attended as a kid. The sad thing is that even with the distinct hint of ass-cheek hanging out of her shorts, she is one of the most conservatively dressed girls I see on the campus when I drop her off in the mornings. Where are the parents when some of these little “Businesswomen Of The Night” are getting ready for school in the morning? I think we all know lust is a sin. Is it time we start demanding more of an opposition to it’s rampant control over us? Can we do such a thing? Can we prove to advertising agencies that we will continue to buy food, beer, and clothing without having to see someone’s half naked daughter first? Is it time that someone let Victoria know that her Secret is out of the bag? We get it, Vicky… like to wear little silky things that make your A-Cups look like C’s. And while we’re on the subject; why the hell do I get a Victoria’s Secret catalog delivered to my house in MY name?!?! I know I could just call and cancel it if I wanted to but quite frankly that’s none of your concern and I’ll thank you to stay out of my personal affairs. I will not post an illustration of lust. If you want to see pictures, type in ANY body part in your search engine and see what comes up.

Anger – Anger is manifested in the individual who spurns love and opts instead for fury. It is also known as Wrath. It’s easy to point to almost anyone you know and remember a time when they lost their temper or said something they later regretted. Anger is just as controlling as lust, yet we somehow have managed to keep our anger in better control than we have managed to keep our sexual urges. Not by much though. Think about it…..would boxing, wrestling, UFC, or any of that other nonsense be as popular as it is if it weren’t for our inherent anger issues?adolf-hitler No it would not. Domestic violence, child abuse, animal cruelty…..all bi-products of anger. The aggressive mentality we breed into our kids is often mistaken for success. The more people who fear you the better you’re doing. Horse-shit!! Stop teaching your kids that their worth is based on the amount of ass they kick you hillbillies! That’s not the way the world needs to work. There are times when physical strength is needed, but it will never be in a ring, chasing another man in tiny shorts while drunken villagers demand blood. I could kick your ass but that just means that someone else is going to come along and kick my ass. Anger really has no place in the world I am trying to build for my children. If it has a place in your world then perhaps YOU are the on in need of a good old fashioned, knock down – drag out, beating.

Greed – You all know what greed is, and we are ALL guilty of it. We live in a society that would gladly be boiled alive in oil as long as the oil was the finest money could buy. We’re basically the Roman Empire in a modern world. We’ve learned nothing from the many lessons greed has greed taught us in the past. We continue to empty our moral accounts in exchange for possessions. I’m not a dirty hippie or anything. I love my house. I love my car. I love the nice clothes that I own, but I didn’t buy any of those things because I needed to prove to someone else that I have money. People who hold their monetary wealth over people are never as happy as they make themselves out to be. Those who do find happiness in wealth alone deserve to be laughed at when it all gets taken away. The big house, the fancy job-title, the snide remarks about those with smaller account balances than you…..what the hell is it all supposed to prove? You’re not as happy as I am, I can assure you. The things that you have squandered; those things that you lay  in bed at night wishing you could get back; they’re my treasures now. They’re my treasures because I don’t view them as possessions. I don’t view them as royal subjects or just pieces of my great life. I view them as my family. Do you honestly believe people are going to remember how much money you made in your lifetime after you die? Do you think they’ll care how big your house was or that you travelled to exotic places? No. You will be remembered for the life you lived, not the money you spent.

Sloth – People often get sloth confused with gluttony and while it is true that the two often go hand in hand, they are two very separate sins. Sloth refers to the avoidance of physical or spiritual work. In other words, when you take a shortcut; cheat on a test; use steroids; delegate work to another; or any other manner of getting out of work……you are sinning. When you seeLazy an opportunity to minister to a stranger but you shy away at the last second; you are sinning. My youngest stepdaughter has a rather annoying habit of putting clothes she doesn’t feel like folding at the moment into the dirty laundry hamper so that someone else will wash and eventually fold them for her. She saves herself all of six seconds by deploying this little maneuver, but she can’t understand why it upsets me and her mom the way it does. (She’s a teenager, so therefore by law, we as her parents are stupid anyway.) I see guys at the gym every night that just personify this sentiment. You know the ones I’m talking about? Juiced up on steroids to the point that their heads are even muscular, yet I rarely see them lifting a weight. Whatever happened to the pride you get from working hard toward a goal. I’m proud of the work I’ve put into the body I have. I’m proud of the victory I can claim over my addiction to nicotine and even more proud of my little brother’s victory over alcohol. NO ONE can ever say that he took the “easy way” out and if you do……I’ll forget all that crap I wrote about controlling my wrath!!

Things have got to change or we are literally heading down the same road as all the other great civilizations that crumbled before us.

As always, thanks for playing.


Monday, September 26, 2011

Innocent Until Proven Guilty (and Other Antiquated Notions)


Ei incumbit probatio qui dicit, non qui negat – The Latin phrase that law students everywhere are not only required to memorize in pronunciation and spelling but also in concept. It’s the presumption of innocence afforded to the accused in a criminal trial. It’s a concept that’s been adopted in many nations. In it’s most basic essence, it means that someone is presumed innocent until guilt can be proven. The burden of proof lies with the prosecution. That’s the fancy way of saying it. The redneck way of saying it may be something like “if yer gonna ‘cuse me of sumthin, you better be havin’ some proof, motherfu……” (I think you get it.) For example, there is no reason to assume that the gentleman pictured here is guilty of any heinous crime based solely on the fact that he had a toilet installed on the veranda of his family home. I’m assuming that this estate does not lie within the borders of a gated community. I’m also assuming that Mr. Porchpooper, Esq. is not talking to his investment advisor on the other end of that ultra-modern cordless phone. These assumptions are a true example of the complete abandonment of a fundamental aspect of our precious legal system. For all I know, this man might be the CEO of a chain of all-night diners, or the head of a powerful and exclusive investment club. You don’t know until all of the facts are presented and weighed. (Although I’m reasonably certain a decent lawyer could get a conviction based on this photo alone!)

It’s kind of the very basis of our legal system, and one that has been manhandled and molested in recent decades. Everybody’s got their favorite stories to point to as evidence of this, and I’m certainly one of them. The most recent of course, being the Casey Anthony trial. People are so sure that woman killed her daughter that we just can’t accept the verdict she eventually received. I wasn’t in the courtroom to hear all of the evidence, and I certainly didn’t watch all the overhyped, round the clock coverage that seemed to grip the minds of the weak and socially hideous. Of course I feel for the little girl, but I don’t feel any more for her than I feel for any other child that is killed. Accusing the mother of a crime for which she was found not-guilty is not our responsibility. If she did kill that girl, she will answer for her crimes but it will not be at the hands of humans. We’re not capable of delivering that kind of punishment here on Earth. Crack

Then there are the clear cut cases of guilt before proof that we’re not allowed to dwell on. Take the case of a young boy in Sweet Springs, MO that brought his mother’s crack pipe to school for show and tell. The boy had $3,700 worth of crack and crystal meth that he brought to show his classmates for show and tell. Ever hear of anything even remotely close to this happening when you were at that age? Now, we have become so jaded in this day and age that we naturally assume the drugs were the product of the mother’s addiction, but what if that’s not the case? What if the mother uses the pipe and drugs to illustrate a point in her role as anti-drug crusader? To assume that the mother is a criminal, or a drug addict just because the kid brought her glass trumpet and it’s smoking rocks to kindergarten would make me a racist, right? No. The mother was arrested and gave no such story. She’s a shame covered monster with rotting teeth in her mouth, poop in her undies, and no business whatsoever raising a child.

With at least a dozen channels out there offering 24 hour news coverage, there is fierce competition for your loyalty. The problem is that there are only 4-6 hours of news in any given day but these channels try to stretch those stories into a full day. Limited “big-stories” also means that each channel is trying to deliver you a unique spin on a common story. There’s only so much creative spin that can be applied to a story before fact becomes fiction. One channel blatantly leans toward the left side of the political aisle, (Not naming names, but I often refer to them as the Clinton News Network) while another stocks it’s anchor desks with human versions of Barbie and Ken and makes no attempt to hide the fact they lean to the right. While this happens to be the channel I choose to watch, I can certainly understand why some people refer to them as FauxNews. The constant and immediate access to news coverage from anywhere in the world has made everyone an expert. Everyone knows all the facts before a case ever makes it to trial. The pretrial verdict never seems to be acknowledged by those who get it wrong. That’s the beauty of news……you only report on the now. Reporting on a mistake you made in a prediction is not current, that’s old news and you now have to get in front of a camera and explain how you had predicted the outcome all along.

Take a look at the following videos and tell me if you notice the subtle differences. You may have to watch a few times to get it, but there are subtle, almost undistinguishable differences in speech patterns, excitement levels, biased inflection, and level of importance placed on the subject’s role in our society. Watch closely…..

Brian Williams is a fantastic news man, but he would be the first to admit that he’s no Walter Cronkite. No one has ever come close to the legendary anchor’s credentials, but Mr. Williams is simply a product of the changes in news and it’s constantly morphing accepted form. Notice the rehearsed and thespian like emotions on the faces of everyone involved in the story of Michael Jackson’s death. The tears that Mr. Cronkite was fighting to keep back were real, I assure you. That was as emotional as Mr. Cronkite ever allowed the world to see him. News was unbiased back then. It was simply a distribution of facts. Opinions and theories were the responsibility of those watching, not the one delivering. While Michael Jackson was obviously a gifted singer and entertainer, I want you to think for a second what his life would have been like without the show business career. If he had been a neighbor of yours without all the money, merry-go-rounds, zoo animals, sequins, and silk; would you have forgiven his constant molestation rumors? No, you would NOT have. Would you have accepted and endorsed the odd changing of his appearance, skin tone, and voice? No, you would NOT. Media has made us believe that these things are okay just as they have made us believe that celebrity is more important than character. While that may be true in the vacuum of the “News World”, it is NOT true in my world. We need to learn to separate the two.

I guess in the end you could make an argument that we do still adhere to innocence until proven guilty. Technology and increased speed at which information is disseminated have simply made guilt much easier and faster to prove. We still get it wrong from time to time, but for the most part, our legal system is still based on sound principals and philosophies. The problems that arise within it are the direct result of human involvement. Not the system itself.

As always, thanks for playing.


Friday, September 23, 2011

Talk About A Dilemma…..

I just finished reading an article about a couple in New York City that has literally set my mind racing with creative possibilities. I am purposely leaving the names and specific details of this couple’s story out of my account because I feel that creative license sometimes makes for a better read, show, or movie. Think about this: If Forrest Gump had been a documentary, do you believe his life would have been blessed with such perpetual happiness and good fortune? Hell no! Forrest’s life would have more closely resembled that of Carl Childers in Sling Blade. In a real world, Forrest would have been eating French-fried-pertaters and sleeping in a hole in the tool shed out back. Plus, doesn’t the idea of Tom Hanks doing his treasured role, with the same accent but with Carl’s voice and body just get you all giddy inside like it does me? I love both movies, but part of what makes them memorable is the creative journey on which both fictional films take us. I plan to do the same with this story. I plan to use this blog post to look at all the possibilities my overactive, Disney influenced mind can come up with. 
Now, like I said in the beginning of this post, I am leaving out a lot of the details that make this story fact for a simple reason: I’m more interested in exploring the unknown variables, the unanswered questions, and the what-ifs my brain was left pondering after I read the story.
I think what makes this story so interesting is the fact that we can’t help but to put an “Americanized” spin on it in our heads. We hear “leader of a people” and we think of all the hoopla that surrounds our leaders. We think of the great wealth, power, and praise given; albeit mostly unjustified, to those in positions of power in our country and it becomes hard to picture a leadership system like the ones that must exist in remote lands like the one from which this couple hails. Our laws, values, and beliefs hold no bearing whatsoever on the day to day lives of the people in that part of the world. The idea of carrying a little dog around in a purse while flashing your vagina as you exit a shiny car is as confusing a thought to them as string theory confirmation is to non-physicists. The money that they have made here in the United States, while probably not a staggering sum, is most likely more than anyone in their African neighborhood can imagine. Okay, let’s take a look at the creative inspirations that immediately bounced around my brain as I read this story before I get too wrapped up in a comparison of America and Africa. Just remember this if you get confused……Africa = Very rarely does anyone flash their vagina while exiting a vehicle; has lions. America = NO Lions; Vaginal flashing has essentially replaced the handshake as a form of greeting in parts of L.A.. I want to explore the possibilities that Hollywood would come up with had this true story been a fictional manuscript submitted to them by a hungry young author.
IDEA ONE: Sleepless in Ghana – Mr. Zemeckis could turn this story into cinematic gold as a love story in which the tribal leader of the proud Akwamu people agrees to move to America so that his beloved wife may feel the love he has for her. In Ghana, she is just the wife of the king; always present but never receiving any of the adoration cast at her husband. The husband, caring little about his celebrity and deeply for his wife, agrees to move to America and to, get this… for his wife as a cab driver. Toss in an evil corporation trying to buy the land on which she runs her cab company, a few perfectly placed supporting cast-members, some witty banter and humorous cultural confusion, and a community bonding victory over ‘the man’ to end the film and this thing could be one of those movies that women watch with a tub of ice cream and a box of Kleenex after a breakup. Oh, and somebody has to have a really cute kid with a couple of innocently memorable lines to make the whole thing work.
IDEA TWO: Blood Yams – The Coens could take a stab at the dark side of the annual Yam harvest in the Eastern border towns of Accra. Made to look like a festival, but covering up a sinister plot that has plagued the region for centuries. The annual harvest festival provides the perfect cover for the bold escape the ruler of the region must make to save not only his own life but the life of his beloved bride as well. Landing in America but constantly looking over his shoulder for the one they call The Tuber Assassin, the fugitive ruler slips into a realm of madness few of us will ever encounter. The freedom of America becomes his prison as he fears death at every corner. I’m picturing Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje as the mysterious assassin, but with Javier Bardem’s haircut from No Country For Old Men.
IDEA THREE: Coming to Adenta – How could you not picture Eddie Murphy in the role of a tribal chief who thought he had escaped the political demands of his family decades ago only to find that he is now the chief and ruler of five African towns? Opening with Eddie Murphy in a stereotypical argument with another cabbie who has just slammed into the back of his vehicle, Mr. Murphy receives information (in a predictably lighthearted manner) that he is now the exalted chief of a tribe in Africa. Telling his wife, who has been his boss for nearly three decades, that they are moving to Africa where she will “worship him” would be a scene worth seeing by itself!
IDEA FOUR: The Truth – If you haven’t taken the time to read the New York Times article i linked above, please do so. I am very rarely a fan of the New York Times and my dependence on them for anything newsworthy is even less frequent, but I was led to this particular article via several others. The truth, as it is written by Ms. Haughney, is just as fascinating as anything Hollywood could create. Sure, there would have to be some fictional supporting characters sprinkled in, and maybe a few minor changes to the scenery that make movies more appealing than reality, but all in all…… this is a story that’s just waiting for a cinematic adaptation. 
Well, that’s about it for today’s wisdom. I hope you don’t actually feel dumber having read this dribble, but I appreciate the fact that you’re still reading if you have gotten this far. I’m sure something will happen over the weekend that inspires a more typical rant on Monday.
Thanks for playing!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Applauding the Under Achiever…

I gave up on the idea of abolishing handouts and entitlement mentality in our country long ago but lately, it has just gotten to a point of absurdity. The level of selfish, unjustifiable entitlement has gotten WAY out of hand and we have a Presidential administration who seems to think it will be just fine. If I have to watch our Buffoon In Chief look down his nose at me and tell me “it’s what the American people want” in that arrogant tone of his one more time, I may defect to Fiji. If he wins the upcoming election, my brain may literally explode.

While I understand that there are those out there who will never be convinced that good ol’ Barry; The Benign Sovereign; The Messiah In Chief is anything other than the greatest leader in history, I want to assure you all that you’re wrong. You’re wrong on every issue to which you point and claim victory. Just because the media has distorted facts and numbers to a point of convoluted fantasy that even L. Ron Hubbard would have a tough time deciphering does not mean that Obama is steering OUR country in the right direction.

The left side of the political aisle continues to blame Bush for everything. That was their agenda during the last campaign and apparently that strategy has not changed much leading into the upcoming one. If people were willing to look at actual facts and legitimate numbers, perhaps some of their opinions would change but even that is giving a lot of advance credit to people who will simply defy logic at every turn. Skin color does NOT make a good leader. For decades, I have been told; as a white man, that I should not judge a black man based on the color of his skin but rather by his actions and abilities. (Yes, I see the irony in that request!) Well, did we not elect a man into the most powerful office in the world based solely on the color of his skin. I was made to feel that voting against Barrack Hussein Obama would make me a racist. I was told to ignore the fact that he has still not proven that he is a legal US Citizen. I was told to ignore the fact that he had done NOTHING during his ridiculously short senate career. I was told to ignore the fact that he came from the most corrupt state in the history of this country and elect him because electing a black man was “what the American people wanted.”

I’m not sure which American people give him his information, but this American has no problem electing a QUALIFIED black man as President. In fact, I really don’t care what color your skin is, how tall you are, what form of genitalia you possess, or whether or not your wife looks like an extra in a movie about prison riots. All I care about is that you are qualified to lead this great country according to what the American people REALLY want. We don’t want record setting unemployment rates, deficits, stock market declines, communist healthcare, and spending that would make MC Hammer scratch his head in disbelief. (That dude had a solid gold toilet!!) We don’t want to be constantly misled, talked down to, and flat out deceived. Let’s take a look at the most common arguments for the current administration, shall we?

1) The Deficit –  “Deficit” has become a word that just gets tossed around casually in political discussions. Elected officials believe the sheep in their flocks are too stupid to see through the BS They throw at us, but the truth is that Obama racked up more debt in his first 20 months as President than Bush did in all eight years in office. (Bush took the deficit from $3.3 trillion on January 20, 2001 to $6.3 trillion on January 20, 2009 which equates to $3 trillion in deficit spending. Obama spent $3.3 trillion in his first 20 months.) In fact, Obama spent more in his first 19 months as President than every President from George Washington through Ronald Reagan COMBINED!! And when you look at what that money was spent for, you may be joining me in the old brain explosion recovery ward.

Deficit Cartoon 


2) Vacations – Remember how much grief was given to Bush every time he went to his Crawford ranch for a few days of relaxation. Remember how he “relaxed” by spending his time clearing brush and repairing barbed-wire fences around his own personal property for which the taxpayers had to shell out very little? Remember that? While it is true that Bush took more vacation days than Obama probably will, I think it is important to look at the cost of those vacations and compare them to the cost of Obama’s extravagant travels. Bill Clinton took his family to Hawaii during his Presidency. (Please let it be documented that this is the one and only time I will EVER use Bill Clinton in a positive manner!!!) He did so during the Christmas season. Clinton stayed at a beachfront home on Bellows Air Force Base. Owned by the government, cost the taxpayers very little. Obama, on the other hand stayed at a 5 bedroom, five and a half bath, beachfront home. The total expense of the vacation was over $1.5 million that WE forked over. That’s BEFORE “unknown” expenses like pre-surveillance, office rentals, catering, golf outings, and shopping. And let’s not forget his “romantic evening” in New York City with Michelle. Let’s not forget the 9,000 gallons of fuel burned in Air Force One to go plant a single tree for Earth Day. The list goes on.

These are just two of the areas that people so often compare. I don’t believe that George W. Bush was the greatest President ever, but at least he did what he said he was going to do. It may have been something that the whole world was screaming for him not to do, but if he said it, he did it.

The Cloward / Piven Strategy of Economic Recovery states that activists should work to sabotage and destroy the welfare system; the collapse of the welfare state would ignite a political and financial crisis that would rock the nation... Think about that. Are we there? Are we at a point where there are more people with their hands out than there are putting money into the coffers? If we’re not there already, we are speeding toward it with speeds that would make the F-22 look like a Volkswagen Bus. If highly educated and trained workers continue to lose jobs and business falters as a whole, where will these jobless workers go? Could this be construed as revolutionary social reorganization that puts the underachiever above the achiever? Where is the future economic strength when jobless professionals collect welfare and unemployment while dreaming of a minimum wage job? For whites, there's not even the hope of a good paying construction job. I won’t go into the details of this strategy because quite frankly some of them are just ludicrous, but if you get the time to look it up, do so. It will definitely make you think and quite possibly soil yourself.

Thanks for playing!


Tuesday, September 20, 2011

New $1.00 Coins



It’s just a little coin. What’s the big deal?

While the US Mint is all atwitter over the release of their new coin into circulation around the country, I’m not nearly as excited. It seems that the good folks at the mint have forgotten one key aspect of the coin in all their publicity leading up to its release.

The phrase “In God We Trust” will not be making an appearance on this version of our currency. It seems that those words, despite their factual presence in the creation of our country, have now been deemed offensive. Even though a Christian God was very prevalent in the hearts, minds, and souls of many of the men responsible for forming this great nation, it would now appear that the very freedoms they fought to secure have been manipulated and legislated into something over which they would bow their heads in shame. Our national motto is now offensive.

“You can’t force me to worship your God, dude!”

“Hey man, I’m really educated. I’m way too educated to depend on some wish-granter in the sky to run my life.”

First of all, the people who say such things are NEVER as educated as they think they are. No one is trying to say that you HAVE TO believe in God because His name appears on your money, you whiney little douche! No one is saying that you must go to Church and you must pray every night or the money in your wallet will cease to have value. No one is claiming that having the phrase “In God We Trust” on your bills or coins means that you are required to believe in one God. In fact, the First Amendment to the United States Constitution does a pretty good job of saying exactly the opposite. We left the tyranny of religious oppression and established a country where you are free to worship whenever, wherever, and whoever you choose. That does not mean that the rest of the country has to agree with you. That does not mean that you get to change the history of my country. I don’t really give a flying fornication if God’s name on your money causes you to toss and turn at night. If you’re that sensitive then maybe you need to tighten up your training bra and start a testosterone regimen. “In God We Trust” is a motto. It’s not a law. It’s a historical fact. This country was founded so that men and women who were tired of being told where they had to worship by a tyrannical British government could enjoy the freedom to worship at a time and place of their choosing. If we’re going to rewrite history to suit the needs of every group with a voice then I would like to offer a few suggestions of my own.

1. Money - Needs a complete overhaul. The pictures of our Presidents should be updated with a more modern hairstyle so as not to offend the ever growing number of stylists in our midst. Also, the wig George Washington wears is a slap in the face to bald people, drag queens, and Barbara Bush. Erase it.

2. Families – Prohibit these offensive groups from flaunting their unity in public. Every day, single people with no kids are oppressively forced to watch as families, or “genetically unified gangs” as we should start calling them, display their unity with no regard whatsoever to the feelings of those around them.

3. Trees – Get rid of them. There are a lot of people in this country who came from regions of the world that simply don’t have trees. For us as Americans to spitefully enjoy such oxygen enriching states as those found on the two coasts is shameful. Right now, I’m staring out the window of my home and I’m ashamed of the trees outside. Mocking the family from Arizona that just moved in downstairs. Changing colors, inviting us into their majestic deceit. Pathetic.

4. Mountains – Mountains are just an example, but really anything tall needs to be abolished. We are completely ignoring the plight of those suffering from Acrophobia.

5. Fire Extinguishers – Offensive to arsonists.

6. Locks – Offensive to burglars and thieves.

7. Reproduction – Let’s face it folks, the act of reproduction is seriously offensive to those who subscribe to the “Stick Your Parts Wherever They Might Fit” doctrine. Down with breeders.

8. Clothing – It’s simply too subjective and subjectivity apparently offends. Clothing shall be issued by the government so that we all look exactly alike.

9. Elevator Buttons – Standard placement of the buttons in an elevator is a direct slap in the face to midgets and dwarves. I’m sorry……”little people”.

These are just a few suggestions, but I’m sure there are many more. We don’t want to offend anyone, so if I’ve left you or your group of concerned citizens out, please feel free to let me know about it.

I sincerely hope that you were able to sense the sarcasm above. In God We Trust stays. It’s as simple as that. It is a founding principle of our country. Just because your absurdly outnumbered voice seems to scream the loudest; that does NOT give you the right to devalue the Christian God that guided the principles of this great nation.


Oh! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand
Between their loved home and the war's desolation!
Blest with victory and peace, may the heaven rescued land
Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation.
Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust."
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave!

(Rarely sung 4th Verse of The Star Spangled Banner)


I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America. One nation, UNDER GOD, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.


I truly believe that America is still an ongoing experiment in Liberty. No one gave us a chance in our infancy. Those who felt they were so immersed in the Age of Enlightenment couldn’t wrap their minds around a self-governed society. Especially not in a land as vast and a culture as diverse as the one America was becoming in those days. Well, those days are gone, but the experiment continues. We are a diverse nation. The overwhelming majority of us DO believe in God and those absurdly vocal few who disagree will not change our minds. The God that influenced the creation of the country you now call home was a Christian God. Your disagreement will not change that fact.

God is not a wish-granter in the sky. God does not care which football team wins (although I do believe He wears a Cowboys jersey after Church on Sundays). God does not help you win the lottery and he does not help you defeat an enemy if your reasons for battle are self-serving or immoral. The Founding Fathers (NO….they are NOT ‘The Framers’ you liberal, Californicated, enema-nozzle!!) did not EVER demand that all citizens of this great country pray to a particular God. They very carefully gave you the right to pray to any God you choose, but the laws, morals and principals of this country are based on the teachings of Jesus Christ through the Holy Bible. Get used to it, accept it, and move on. It’s fact. You can’t change facts by whining.


Thanks for playing.